


Courtship

by Lady_Kit



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Anxiety, Anxiety about relationships, Cultural Differences, F/F, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Platonic Relationship, Pre-Spicyhoney, jealousy (light), pre-Alphyne, unconventional flirting, ‘Practice’ relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-01
Updated: 2019-11-01
Packaged: 2021-01-15 21:08:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21259679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Kit/pseuds/Lady_Kit
Summary: Edge is spending a lot of time with Swapdyne.... Clearly, Rus needs to intervene on her behalf.Or: Rus learns a lesson about Fell-verse courtship.





	Courtship

**Author's Note:**

> This is loosely based on an anon’s request...emphasis on ‘loosely’. Sorry, Anon.
> 
> (Also, Rus is being a bit of a jerk, but I swear there’s a reason.)

Rus’ sockets narrowed, seeing Edge walking by his sentry station. “what’s with the flowers, fuckfell?”

Edge didn’t even look at him. “I fail to see how that’s any of your business.”

“it’s my universe.” He fell into step beside him, then mentally cursed Edge’s absurd pace. It felt like he was jogging. “it’s my business.”

Edge barely glanced at him. “If you must know, I’m here to see your Undyne.”

Rus faltered. “what? why?”

“Again, I fail to see how that’s any of your business.”

“we’re friends!”

“Ah, then I’m sure she’s told you all about our rendezvous. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to be late.” With that, he somehow started walking even faster, leaving Rus behind. 

-

Rus drummed his fingers against the kitchen table. What was Fuckfell up to anyway? He’d come and gone multiple times in the week. If he followed the same schedule, he’d likely be passing through Underswap today as well....

“Maybe they’re dating.” Rus looked up at his brother.

“who?”

“Edge and Undyne.”

“what?! why would you think—?”

Blue shrugged, plating hashbrowns and pancakes onto a plate. “Alphys has seen them around. Talking. Having dinner. Edge even brings her presents. It definitely looks like they’re dating....”

Rus stood, features flushed. “they can’t be! who would want to date that arrogant jackass anyway?” Blue paused as he set the plate down. He gave Rus a look. “what?!”

Blue held his hands up in surrender. “Nothing! You just seem overly interested in Edge’s romantic life....”

“i am not! i—i’m just—!” Blue watched him flounder, his brow-bone creeping higher. “i’m worried about undyne!”

Blue cocked his head to the side. “You’re worried about—? Why?”

“we’re friends! it’s my job to make sure she doesn’t date any assholes—and edge definitely qualifies!”

“...if you say so, brother. Here. Eat your eggs.”

-

Rus spent more time at his sentry station in the coming weeks than he had in the last few months combined. Watching Edge come and go. Sometimes he was carrying flowers or a present of some sort—once he was carrying a teddy bear, and Rus felt a sudden surge of irrational, inexplicable anger at that gift in particular—but sometimes he came empty-handed. Sometimes he dressed in what, for him, served as casual attire—light armor, combat boots, and a thick cloak for warmth. On occasion, though, he came dressed in darkly shining armor, the buckles polished and the old cloak replaced with a guardsman’s cape. 

(He was _not_ particularly attractive in the formal uniform. He wasn’t. The black iron armor didn’t contrast nicely with his bones. The red jewels in the chest piece didn’t glimmer like his eyelights. He _wasn’t_ and it _didn’t_ and they _didn’t_!)

Once, Rus saw him on his way to visit Undyne, but he didn’t see him return until the following day, and that was really the last straw. 

Rus was not going to stand by any longer and let this continue! Edge couldn’t be dating Undyne! It wasn’t right! Wasn’t—wasn’t _appropriate_! Undyne was sweet and innocent and soft and Edge was anything but. Rus could not, in good conscience, allow this to continue.

So, he waited for Edge to appear once again, and quietly followed him. He hated Hotland, and especially hated the labs, but he’d go to save Undyne from making such a Great and Terrible Mistake, wherever it took him.

-

“Don’t try to make her jealous,” Edge cautioned, flipping through the menu at NTT’s. 

Undyne flushed brightly, fiddling with the necklace Edge insisted she wear tonight. “I-I’m not! I just—“ She flushed again when Edge gently pulled her hand away from the necklace to hold it against the table. “She w-wouldn’t be j-jealous anyway.... Alphys is s-so cool and I’m just....”

Edge shut the menu and leaned close. “Care to bet on that?”

“Wh-what?”

He sat back in his chair, squeezing her hand when she tried to start fiddling again. “I propose a wager. I’m willing to bet that Alphys is already interested—she’s just waiting for you to ask.”

She stared at him, and not for the first time, Edge felt a pang, watching her. So like and so unlike his own Undyne. His Undyne had always been good to him and being allowed to repay some of that kindness—in a place that didn’t forbid it—felt...nice. “So?” he asked, “How much gold are you willing to lose?”

She blushed and looked away. “C-can we p-practice a bit m-more? P-please?”

He fought not to roll his eyelights. Tale-verse courtship, he suspected, was only interesting when both parties were romantically interested in each other. Nevertheless, he nodded. “As you wish.”

After all, he had his own reasons for ‘practicing’. This was a mutually beneficial arrangement, after all.

Just as he was bracing himself for another round of discussing whatever topic Undyne thought her Alphys might be interested in, her gaze caught on something behind him. He turned at just the right moment. Something white flashed toward him, and he ducked his head, catching it in his hand. A fist, he realized, as another flew toward the other side of his face. He caught that one too, and found himself holding Rus’ fists, one in each hand.

His soul beat hard, and not just because his LV was pushing him to fight back. Instead, he cleared his throat and raised a brow-bone. “What a strange way of saying ‘hello’. I’ll be sure to remember it next time we meet. I wouldn’t want you to think I was being impolite.”

Rus glared at him and yanked his hands back. Edge let him go, though he made sure to trail his fingers over the backs of his hands as he did. Had Rus noticed? Had his eyelights briefly flared? Or was that just wishful thinking?

“i’ve had it. that’s it. i don’t know what you’re up to, fuckfell, but you’re going to leave undyne alone. she deserves better than someone like you.” 

“Is that meant to be an insult? Come on, Swapshit. I know you’re more inventive than that. Please—tell me how you really feel.” He definitely wasn’t imagining the flush across Rus’ cheekbones. He smirked, and the flush deepened.

Undyne pushed between them, shoving Rus back. “I-it’s okay, P-Papyrus! He’s h-helping me.”

“with what?!”

Undyne blushed and looked away, shoving him further and further away from the table. “N-nothing! Nothing to w-worry about!”

“Courtship.”

The two Tale-verse monsters froze. Rus gaped, while Undyne’s blush deepened until her whole face appeared purple.“courtship.”

Edge stood, folding his napkin neatly on the table. “Yes. Undyne wanted a safe party to practice her dating skills on.”

Rus’ lower jaw appeared to have detached from his skull. “dating skills—? safe party—? i! in what universe are you at all ‘safe’?”

“This one, apparently.”

Rus clenched his jaw. “look here. i don’t want you anywhere near her.”

“Oh? And how, exactly, do you plan to stop me? Besides, isn’t that up to her?”

Rus lifted a finger, mouth open. Then the finger curled closed and he shut his mouth, looking between them. With a groan, he demanded, “why come to him of all people? what does he know about dating anyway?”

Still flushed, Undyne looked down at the ground, her index fingers tapping against each other. “i—he—“ She tried to hide, but the dress she wore wasn’t as easy to hide behind as her lab-coat. 

“She’s practicing,” Edge repeated. “And she’s teaching me what she knows about courting in the gentler universes.”

Rus scoffed. “yeah, i bet—why not tell her what ‘courtship’ is like where you’re from?”

Edge smirked. “Happily. You see, doctor, where I’m from, monsters express their interest a bit more aggressively.”

“see?!”

“Usually...” Edge glanced at him out of the corner of his socket, “...they start with a little verbal sparring. It’s the Fell equivalent to flirting.” Rus went very still. “There might also be displays of fighting skill. Showing your willingness to fight in defense of allies can be very enticing. Otherwise, it’s not so different. An exchange of gifts is often customary...though the nature of the gifts may differ.”

Rus swallowed and looked away. A faint flush graced his features. “so—“ His voice cracked a little. “um. why...why is she, uh, teaching you about tale-verse dating? sounds like you’ve probably got fell dating on lockdown.”

“Just in case I wish to express my interest in a Tale-verse monster. I would hate to have my intentions misconstrued.”

Rus nodded frantically. “cool. okay. yeah. yeah. cool. welp, i’m, uh...i’m gonna leave you two to it then.” 

Edge shook his head as he walked away, stopping briefly to apologize when he ran into a nearby table. “Would you like to continue with our ‘date’?” He held his hand out to Undyne. After a moment of thought, she accepted and allowed him to guide her back to her seat.

While he pretended to study the menu—his mind was already awhirl with thoughts both anxious and hopeful—Undyne studied him. “So...I thought you said not to make them jealous?”

His claws tore into the edges of the menu while his skull grew hot. He laid it down carefully and glared at her. Sometimes he was reminded of her similarities to his Undyne too. 

Not wanting to spook her, he carefully flattened the crumpled edges of his menu. “I said ‘her’. Don’t try to make ‘her’ jealous. If your Alphys is anything like my Undyne, she won’t respond positively to that.”

“And what about...?” She looked toward the door, where Rus had disappeared.

He coughed and took a drink of water. She didn’t relent, just watched him with a growing smile. Carefully, he replied, “I...am not necessarily looking for a ‘positive’ response.”  That netted him a puzzled expression. He turned back to the menu. “Do you know what you want?”

“Do _you_?”

He huffed. He definitely deserved that one. “I think the fish tacos look rather good, don’t you?” he asked pointedly.

He was Fell, not Tale. Some things could not be succinctly explained. 

-

Rus stood outside his house, chain-smoking and restlessly pacing in stops and starts. 

He had—

Edge had been—

Rus had been—!

He swallowed and eyed his cigarette. He’d lost count at this point, and the nicotine was starting to make him nauseous. He flicked the cigarette away, listening to it hiss as it hit the snow. His soul was humming. Stuffing his hands into his pockets, he leaned against the side of the house.

Edge had been flirting with him this whole time. And Rus had accidentally reciprocated. 

And he...

He...

He...he wasn’t...he didn’t hate the idea.

That was really the part that had him reeling. As Edge had professed the reason he was so interested in Tale-verse dating etiquette, he’d looked at Rus as if he could see straight to his soul, and as if he liked what he saw. Rather than being horrified or appalled—as he’d have insisted he found the idea only a short time ago—Rus’ soul seemed to swell and hammer harder and faster. He could hear the mana rushing through his earholes. He hadn’t been able to think while Edge looked at him like that. He had to leave.

Even now, though, his thinking felt muddled. What was he supposed to do with this new knowledge? Could he continue to trade verbal blows, knowing Edge was actually flirting with him? Could he stop?

Did he want to?

He flicked his lighter. He paced. He took out a cigarette and looked at it before stuffing it back into the pack. He kicked the snow until it soaked through his shoes and froze his toes. 

“Brother?” He turned. Blue held out a blanket. “You’ve been out here for a while.”

“i’ll be in in a minute, bro. just...thinking.”

Blue toed the pile of cigarette butts. “...don’t think too much. At this rate you’ll give yourself lung cancer....”

“we don’t have—“

Blue rolled his eyelights. “It’s not good for you! And neither is standing out here in the cold. Come on. I made soup—your favorite. Tomato basil.”

“...with grilled cheese?”

“You expected anything less?”

Rus chuckled fondly and let Blue lead him inside. “hey, uh...bro?”

“Yes?”

Rus opened his mouth. Then shut it and shook his head. “never mind.”

“Papy, you can’t do that! What is it?”

He looked away and shrugged. “just, uh, wondering if alphys knows undyne has a thing for her?”

Blue rolled his eyelights, and started to rant about his mentor’s obliviousness and how they’d all be much happier if they just admitted their attraction was mutual and finally—“Are you listening to me?”

“huh? oh, yeah! of course! just thinking that...you’re right. they’d probably be a lot happier if they, uh...if they just went for it. right?”

“Exactly! That’s precisely my point! They—“

“but, bro...what if it goes badly? what then?”

“Don’t be absurd! They’re meant for each other!”

“okay, but how do you know that? how do you know alphys won’t get annoyed when undyne has an anxiety attack? how can you be sure undyne won’t get hurt if alphys gets a little too intense? they’re both so different. how can you be so sure they’re good for each other?”

Blue floundered, staring at him. Then he shook his head and stabbed at his soup. “You know, brother, sometimes you need to be a little more optimistic.”

It was not, Rus noticed, an answer. He stirred his soup as the silence stretched between them.

**Author's Note:**

> ...it feels like there’s more here. I might continue this? We’ll see....
> 
> Shard your feelings in the comments! All comments are loved and appreciated, even if I’m bad about replying!


End file.
